Friday, June 02, 2006

Work!! Or not?

Another week of work has come to an end. This week wasn't very hard, but what week is at this job. Temping is the apparently the first job the post graduate, pre-career platform job. Data entry is apparently the only job that they actually pay humans to do even though a monkey could do it just as effectively. I suppose I should be happy about having a job that requires no thought, no training, and absolutely no energy. Instead, I find myself wondering if the last few years of school are draining out of my finger tips with every keystroke. I hope I don't lose everything I've learned before I begin teaching.

I'd like to take this opportunity, however, to share about my fellow-employees. Working in the tight, non-airconditioned cubicle village has created some of America's Finest Employees. The tension that exists in this smoke/coffee filled air could be cut like a knife, but provides for a little humor in the process. Only nicknames are used, of course.

"Hugo" .... try Hu--not! Muscle shirts should only be worn by extremely HOT guys who work out more than they breathe. Hugo, with his slick, black muscle shirt stood in the filing room, flabbily hanging out over the belt that was holding up his highwater Levi's. This is absolutely not allowed. As I tried to walk by to put a file away, he barely moved out of the way and rubbed his chest looking down at it. ARE YOU SERIOUS! Please!! Gross doesn't begin to say what was running through my mind. Someone call the fashion police. Hurry!

"Computer Carl" -- this guy is classic. Sitting at the chair across my desk, I notice his bare love handles hanging out from under his raggidy, dryer beaten, polo shirt. Now, I don't know about you guys, but bare love handles are extremely attractive, especially on a mid-50's beer guzzler from Denver. I don't know what I ever saw in guys my age. I'm switchin' to the older crowd.

"Wanda the WACKO" -- My favorite! If you ever saw a woman in her mid 40's with OCD working in payroll, then you will know what I mean when I tell you this lady is a freak. If the stamp on the time sheet is not angled exactly at 90 degrees, she will politely and condesendingly pull you over and explain the process to you. As a germ-a-phobe she points out potential office procedures that could lead to sickness. As a hypocrite, she sits at her desk with her bare feet and also sits on the floor as well. I wouldn't touch the floor with my bare-anything and I feel like disinfecting my shoes at night. But my favorite action of Wanda is when she asks her Magic 8 ball for advice. I am serious folks. She actually reaches for her 8 ball and asks it questions throughout the day. I've never met a person over 10 that asks an 8 ball a question about anything remotely serious. This new source of office consulting may be the wave of the future and you may want to get an 8-ball for yourself.

TGIF... back to the monotony on Monday.


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