Sunday, June 11, 2006

"The Movie Talker"

Most people have their pet peeves. I am no exception to this rule. I have many pet peeves, probably too many, which may be a main reason I sit home every Saturday night admiring the cleanliness of my apartment and finding things to straighten. (Did you see the Wedding Planner with J-Lo... when she is vaccuuming the blinds with the attachment ... ---->ME!) Back to my peeving...

Yes, I have pet peeves. Some that are not worth sharing for the sake of you keeping your lunch down, but others have their place on the blog. I hate it when a person's brake light doesn't work on their vehicle and you find yourself in their back seat and wondering ... when did they start to stop! I hate it when there is food on the couch or someone wiped their dirty, greasy hands on the couch or pillow as if it was a napkin, which was less than 50ft away (face it, the apt. isn't that big ya lazy). I really hate it when someone takes the remote out of your hands and changes the channel, or if they turn the radio station, or worse, when they simply turn off the radio/cd without asking! WHAT! Who does that you say, well, I know plenty of rude people that have done that. However, I have a pet peeve that kills me and seems to be one of my many plagues recently. ---- Update on the bugs, Roach Motel's work and so does the Blackflag Spray! Thank you Walmart.-----

My pet peeve of the week is "the movie talker". Yes, I said it. The movie talker is a person that feels the need to comment, question, suggest, or narrate a movie while in progress. Now. This cannot be tolerated under any circumstances. Recently, I was watching a movie with my un-named co-habitator and her counterpart. Enjoying my popcorn and diet pepsi, I was suddenly stunned from my brainless state by questions and comments coming from the couch.

"What's that?" she asks.
"It's the guy that's coming to teach her about her powers." he replies.
"What is she thinking, doesn't she know that's dangerous?" she continues.
"Well, it's a room where the floor is just those panels ...." her clammer on.

PLEASE BE QUIET! I felt like screaming, but didn't. To my own detriment, I find myself in torture for a long six hours as we proceeded through our previously planned X-men marathon before going to the theatre to see the new one. (which I loved!) The two commented, and gave a narrative ... seriously saying things like, "she's going to the door", "he's using a fire ball to blow up those trucks", and "her hair is gray now".

This is not a baseball game being broadcast on the radio. It is not a golf tournament where the commentator whispers to the on-lookers about the strokes that have been made and whether or not he needs this birdie. NO. This is a movie. You are supposed to stuff your face with butter and caffine and sit mindlessly while allowing your dormant emotions to be rocked by the ultimate action packed, epic romantic comedy you paid $9.50 to see. (yes, it costs $9.50 to see a movie here in Las Vegas) The only thing worse than this is when a person comes into the movie late and wants to know everything about what's going on and whenever a new character enters the screen, they say "who's that". Dang Gina... that bugs!

Well, you might be giggling a little by now, but I know you know what I'm talking about. We have all been there. If not, you will experience it and when you do, you will be thinking, where is my blow-horn and hand-held sledge hammer? These people need a muzzle and I'm telling you that next time, if I'm not too hard up for company, I'm going to the movie by myself. (Which is a totally liberating experience for anyone who hasn't tried it. Just talk on the phone until you go in and sit down and then enjoy the row, seats, popcorn, soda, candy, and NO TALKING to your hearts desire, ... or two hours, whichever comes first.)

Now, to all of you out there who are movie talkers, and you know who you are.


Here is my Russian lady friend as a helpful reminder. If you continue your movie talking madness, I will send her to your house.

Until later, enjoy, comment, and stay out of trouble.



Blogger 4rest said...

You are so right. "The Movie Talker" can really make you regret spending the money. Everytime I walk in to a theater where there are a bunch of teens acting giddy, I always get nervous until they calm down. Most of the time they don't ruin the movie but there have been too many situations where they have.

Also, why do people bring babies to movies if they have any inclination at all that the kid will scream? Find a baby-sitter or wait until it comes out on DVD.

2:44 PM  

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